How To Unlock The Potential of Witnessing Your Thoughts

In the same way, life gets so busy that so many things pass us by, so it is with our minds. Some days your mind is so busy that your thoughts overwhelm you, while other days it is just quiet.

The mind can propel you to achieve your desired results in life, and if you can train it to reclaim its natural capability to stay in the present and only wander off to your pre-designed destination, then nothing within the human ability would be beyond your reach. Your mind is always racing with thoughts, some, you recognize while others, you don’t, just like your breath. This is because you are continuously choosing when, and how you want to process those thoughts, which your biases, experiences, knowledge, or lack of presence play a significant role.

One thing, for sure is this, thoughts will always be racing through your mind just like the flowing river. What will you do? Resist them? Hold on to them? Or do nothing?

Take a moment of silence and notice the overflow of thoughts pouring into your mind. Do not resist, hold, nor react to them. Can you pinpoint where your thoughts are coming from? Somewhere or nowhere? Can you label them? Do you know why these thoughts are popping up? Are you tempted to stop, or embrace them? Do you define yourself by them? Are you dazed by them?

Notice who or what is watching them pass, like the moving clouds. Can you see that you were the spectator? That you were, in fact, separate from your thoughts? If you choose to resist, hold, or react to any thought, you halt the process. This might be a good or an undesirable thing depending on whether you seek inner peace or chaos. Just as you use the ladder to climb up to get a task done, use the same to go down into your very depths to unravel the answers you seek.

You should apply this process of watching your thoughts as an independent entity to life’s challenges. When faced with inconvenient situations or even difficult people, and you are tempted to be anxious and angry, just step aside, break free from the entanglement, and choose the outcome you wish and then act accordingly. Remember not to react. Just like your thoughts, these too shall pass.

Thanks for reading!
Stay Happy


It Begins with Self Love Part Two

This is the concluding part of the series I started a week ago. As you read and assimilate, please take the practical steps suggested to practice love for self and others.

Please leave your suggestions and comments below

4 tips toward building a loving world

  1. Self love is selfless. selflessSelf love is not when you take care of yourself at the expense of others, we have to believe that we all have an immense impact on our surroundings and when we choose to take advantage of people so we can feel better about ourselves, the ripple effects extend beyond our imagination. Show yourself some love by accepting who you are, honestly you cannot change your person because God intended it that way, there is no other person like you in this whole world, think about this; in a world of over 7 billion people, no one else has your finger prints, now this is cranking, you are uniquely made and you have to come to this realization and love yourself more. The good thing about this thought process is that, it helps you to look at yourself and others as gifts to the world to bless it with the uniqueness’ that we possess. This brings me to my second point.
  2. Self love celebrates her uniqueness. Celebrate-Your-UniquenessAs highlighted above, we are all unique and hence have our unique selling point (USP) that is different from everyone else, what we need to do is to find this USP, develop it and then bless the world with it, with this kind of mindset, we compete with no one but ourselves and hence appreciate and love others as much as we love ourselves. No wonder Jesus said, love your neighbor as yourself, this is not too difficult to do when we realize that we are different, unique, and distinct but someway somehow we all came from the same creator. Have you ever sat down to think of the fact that out internal organs are exactly the same irrespective of color, size, and status etc. Accept, appreciate, and love yourself some more.
  3. Self love is gracious to herself and others. Younger sister offers comfort to her big sister after a fall.I will tie this point to the first, we all have our strengths and weaknesses, however most of us tend to be so critical to ourselves, we beat ourselves up for falling short, for not measuring up to standards set by others or even the ones set up by us. One thing we might not know is that we indirectly treat others the same way we treat ourselves. Do you have a very critical person in your life right now? watch their life closely, they are probably very critical of themselves, desiring perfection in everything when we know that we are not perfect and are only pursuing it. Show yourself some grace, I am not saying your should welcome mediocrity and pat yourself on the back when you make mistakes, what I am saying is that know that we are not perfect and whether we like it or not we will fall short at some point; therefore, be gracious to yourself and learn from those mistakes and move on with your life. This mode of operation (MOO) will help you extend grace to others when they offend you or fail you at some point.
  4. Self love is non-judging. pexels-photo-685532.jpegThis point ties in very well with point number three; truth is we judge ourselves because we want everything to be perfect and apparently lack grace. We go through our day judging ourselves because we are either not satisfied with our looks or pay too much attention to the things we cannot change, the sad thing about this is that we extend this to others unknowingly. We see someone walking or sitting in front of us and in a split second we make inaccurate judgement calls by subjecting them to our insecurities and imperfect standards, the result, we lose the opportunity to interact, make friends, influence, and inspire change in people’s lives. Resolve to abolish this mindset of judging yourself and others, accept and embrace yourself and others then you will experience the joy and peace that comes with loving yourself and others unconditionally.


It Begins With Self Love! Part One

Looking at the world today, one will be right to say that there isn’t enough love for self and others. This reasoning is valid because figures don’t lie, there are facts everywhere that point to this truth. Funny enough, I dare to say that most people don’t even know what self love is, talk more of love for others. This could be down to upbringing, growing in an unloving, critical, and judging family or surrounding yourself with people who are always bitter and resentful.
In this article, I will write a bit about self love and how we can apply some of these principles to our lives and extend same to others to make our communities better. The sad truth is that we cannot give what we don’t possess and this means that until we love ourselves unconditionally, we cannot love others.
Curious about the effects of lack of love in today’s world, I went to google trends and I typed “How to kill myself” the results were shocking. The figures are for a period of 12 months from March 5th 2017 to February 4th 2018 and these stats just tell us that our world is broken, take a look at the visualization I did using Tableau software below.

The question is, why would someone want to deliberately kill themselves? Your guess is as good as mine. There is no love in this world and because we are constantly looking outwardly for love and happiness, we are often disappointed, and the result of course is depression, sadness, impure thoughts and we ultimately choose the easier path to end it all.

I have outlined four things we need to be aware of in order to have a loving world, stay tuned for part 2 in a couple of days!


No Room for Excuses

“Excuses are the tools with which persons with no purpose in view build for themselves great monuments of nothing”
Steven Grayhm

That was a great quote by Steven Grayhm, it could not have been more well articulated.
We all give excuses at some points in our lives either to escape from responsibility or to make ourselves feel better about a failure; we try to console ourselves with excuses when we don’t give our best and when the inevitable happens……failure. From the foregoing, it is evident that our failures stem from the series of excuses we give in order not to hold ourselves accountable and reach for the peak.
How many times have we pointed accusing fingers at others? how many times have we tried to comfort ourselves for doing wrong by pointing to others who had done similar things in the past? how many times have we compared ourselves to others who had failed more than us just to feel better? All these are borne from the fact that, we don’t have anything substantial to live for, we lack purpose and are not driven at all, because no man or woman of purpose will give in to excuses.
Excuses can negatively impact our lives and turn us to losers, quitters, and average people.
consider the following and change your thought process:
1. Excuses are for losers: winners do not give excuses, they don’t pay attention to failure with the intention to embrace and feel good about it, but they learn from their mistakes and try to achieve the same things in better ways, their mentality is that they have learned one way not to do it. In sharp contrast, losers are quick to jump into self-defense and give several reasons why they failed and take comfort in the fact that they tried. But unknown to these persons, trying alone is not enough, we must achieve.

To attain success in anything, a series of trials and errors and failures are required because it is only through these that we learn to do things better and by extension grow. Honestly speaking no responsible person would give in to excuses because it devalues who you are and make others take you for granted. If you said you are going to do something, then do whatever it takes to get it done, those excellent reasons why you were unable to do them are mere excuses, period.
2. Only losers quit: I used this word “quit” here but honestly I don’t like using it. Quitting is the easiest thing to do in today’s world, of course that is not so difficult to understand why: the world and life is moving at a very fast pace now that people who cannot match up quickly resort to excuses to feel comfortable. I have been tempted several times to just quit and take the easy route, life can be so hard but we don’t have to just quit like that; we are powerful beyond measure and we are designed to overcome every obstacle and rise to inspire change, but it comes at a prize, we must be determined because nothing can stop a man or a woman of determination. We have to guard our minds with all that we have got, whenever the thought of quitting comes to mind, we have to remind ourselves that the only thing that stands between our success or dream is that inner lying voice that tells us that we cannot achieve it, we must train our minds to recognize this voice and debunk it and only pay attention to the voice of truth that still resides within us. Ultimately, we are the architect of our lives, choose to construct yours the way you want and achieve your potential.
3. Excuses lead to laziness: no matter how vigorous and/or energetic you are, once you start giving in to excuses, you become lazy and your attitude will become that of apathy towards any and everything. The effects of excuses affect every area of our lives, if you gave an excuse why you hit the snooze bottom when the alarm went off today that resulted to your lateness to that appointment or work, that would translate into you giving several reasons why you didn’t go to the gym, read that book, visited that friend, took yourself out, showed some grace to yourself and others etc. ultimately excuses just give us the bad energy not to get anything accomplished.
When I think about why we give excuses, I think most times it is because of our insecurities and lack of self esteem. Apart from trying to make ourselves feel better, we also want to shield our insecurities under the ugly face of excuses.
Some ways we can get rid of excuses
1. know yourself: take time and examine what your strengths and weaknesses are, no one understands you better than yourself. If one of your weaknesses is not keeping promises then try not to promise at all but if you do, make sure you keep them.
2. Honesty: be honest and realistic about your goals and commitments, don’t set goals based on your friends’ and parent’s way of life, don’t say because Tim goes to the gym 4 times a week so I will do the same; in fact I have a confession to make, about a month ago, I asked my friend Shaun what some of his week’s goals were…in his list he included going to the gym 4 times and I thought to myself, I can do this as well, so I included it in my week’s goal. Honestly, I didn’t even go to the gym once that entire week. Why? Because it was not mine, I copied it. I gave several excuses why I should do other things instead.
3. Be resolved: know what you want and what it will take to achieve it and be resolved to go for it no matter what. This is a very crucial step because obstacles will always come and try to stop you but your resolve will be the thing that keeps you going.
4. Delight in trying: don’t be afraid to try new things and don’t be afraid to fail because we will always fail but the good thing about trying is that we get experiences and from these we can learn and grow and do things better.
5. Be responsible: take ownership of your life and make the best choices to drive it to the destination you want. When you know that this is your life and no one else will do for you what you can do for yourself, stepping up to the plate to act without excuses becomes your way of life.